Feelings

So, I'm still feeling tired and have a headache from the stress of yesterday. I honestly wish that life didn't have to be so darn hard. It's difficult to know how to deal with situations when you try one thing and find it doesn't work. When you try to do something opposite, it doesn't work. How exactly do you deal with that? I haven't found the answer. Don't know if there even is one.

I do know that no matter how hard I try, I still do something wrong. I admit that I used to just shut the person down if they were wrong - or if I thought them to be wrong. I have learned over the years to listen first, then process and finally deal with the situation. I play devil's advocate in any argument - even with myself. However, no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to get anywhere with certain people. It's like that quote - "Can't please everyone all the time."  All I do know for certain is that the stress of it all has made me feel sicker than usual. I've had a migraine since yesterday and it sucks. My back and neck have turned to stone due to the fibro knotting them all up. I literally had chest pains last night because of the anxiety. My frustration was just at an all time high because I thought I had gotten somewhere with a situation only to have it go back around to square one.

I'm not going to be stuck living my life by rehashing every wrong ever committed in my past. I have apologized to those people I've hurt and have moved on from that. I don't think the people in the situation last night realize that I have based my thoughts/feelings/opinions on what they did that day or that week. Not something that happened years ago. *sighs* Ah, well, you can lead a horse to water but can't make them drink. I was honest and open and it still didn't do any good. I think it's time to just stop focusing on those that continue to hurt and put that focus on the ones who love me and want to come around me.

Either way, I'm just not well today.
Until next time,
Kay